From behind the Shadows and into the Light
by StarksViolet
Summary: His fierceness burned through me as the pain dissipated and tuned into pure bliss, my weakened state became ever more so as my knees buckled and I felt myself fall into him, I felt myself giving into the darkness. - Will Rose give in to Dimitri, will he finally have her by his side forever? Spoilers for the Novel Series, no link to the Movie.
1. Chapter 1

**Welcome to my first VA FanFic, so excited to be here, and most importantly, please forgive any inconsistencies, I'm a bit rusty as I haven't read the books in a while! I am re reading them, so it'll obviously get better as time permits. Please let me know what you think! **

**Also-Italics are dream sequences, with Adrian or without :)**

* * *

There were times when the dark was soothing, actually most times the dark was soothing. But lately, I was terrified of it. Every sound was a threat to my life, every movement was a threat to my sanity, and every time a shadow flitted past I thought my heart would stop.

On those nights his hands would find their way around my waist, pulling me closer, whispering words of comfort. Only now there was no warmth and no comfort in his voice and the cold spread through me, gripping my heart in an immovable vice.

Tonight was one of those nights.

'Roza,' he whispered brushing his lips across my cheek.

Though I wanted to fight, to pull back and tell him to back off, I did nothing at all.

He pulled my body against his and slowly, sweetly, pierced the skin on my neck forcing a low moan from my lips.

'Stop,' I managed to breathe.

Much to my dismay, he did and he pulled back and looked at me with dark eyes.

His breath danced across my lips with a grin, 'you don't want me to stop.'

As weak as my body was I still managed to shake my head.

'Then why do you do this?' He asked me in a whisper, 'I thought we loved each other.'

'Because this isn't you,' I managed through grit teeth.

His eyes flared up and the red around them intensified before he pushed me away from him and stormed out of the room.

The distinct sound of the lock didn't come and I mustered up enough strength to turn my head toward the door.

Figures, he knows he's keeping me so weak that he doesn't even have to bother with the lock anymore.

I swallowed hard mourning the loss of the ecstasy he provided.

Even though it wasn't Dimitri anymore, he felt the same, his hands on my body were the same, but it was the look in his eyes which shattered me.

My eyes grew heavy and finally closed.

* * *

_'You look like hell, Hathaway.'_

_I turned on my heel and spotted the source of the voice, 'Adrian,' I smirked._

_'Miss me?' He asked stepping closer._

_I shrugged, 'I guess so, you're not a complete loss.'_

_'Are you ok?' He asked his voice suddenly serious._

_I shook my head._

_'You need to try and work out where you are, Rose, we're looking for you, but we can't find you,' he explained stepping closer to me._

_I realised then just how exhausted I was, 'I don't know,' I whispered._

_'You need to try and remember something, anything that can help,' he took my face in his hands._

_I felt all of the strength in my body slowly leaving._

_'He's keeping you weak Rose, I can barely make it to you in your dreams,' he explained, slowly helping me down into the chair._

_Suddenly I noticed that the usually vivid dreams Adrian had created and visited me in were nothing like this, this was dark, unfocussed and hazy._

_'The strength of your mind keeps your dreams vivid, you're fading,' he explained gently._

_Clearly he could read my mind, he was in my head._

_I mentally chastised myself which he grinned at, although his grin held no conviction._

_'Please, try to remember.'_

_My mind raced, trying to think of anything, any small detail._

_'A loud, rushing river and wind through the trees,' I closed my eyes feeling the warmth of Adrian against me._

_I leaned in to his hand and he pulled me closer._

_'What does the outside of the building look like?' he whispered caressing my hair, 'think of the small details.'_

_My mind remained blank, save for the smallest detail, 'cobble stone, like a castle.'_

_'A castle by a river in the woods,' he spoke gently, 'good work Rose.'_

_'I don't think I'm going to make it,' I murmured feeling weaker by the second._

_'You will, because you're you, you're strong, you know you are.'_

_I shook my head against his chest, 'not long enough for you to find me.'_

_'Don't talk like that, just stay focused.' He said firmly shaking me in his arms, 'he's keeping you weak for a reason, because he knows that you're a threat.'_

_His voice sounded miles away. He was leaving me, and the realisation that it was my mind fading terrified me._

_'Fight, don't you dare give up Hathaway,' Adrian added with a hint of urgency in his voice._

_If I could have reacted I'm sure I would have thrown my arms around him. So much confusion ran through my veins._

_Dimitri was for me, my salvation, my equal, Adrian was someone I loved being with, but even undead Dimitri touched my heart more than living Adrian did._

_'I know you love him and any hope to get him back lies with you, so stay alive,' he muttered before planting a kiss on my forehead._

_In that moment I knew how much I had hurt him, despite all the love he had shown me and despite how much I know I could have loved him if Dimitri never came back, I couldn't. Dimitri was my life and I hated it._

_'I'm going to find you little Dhampir,' his voice softened, 'just promise me you won't stop fighting,' he added before letting the dream fade to dark before I could lie about my promise._

* * *

I found myself feeling stronger than yesterday but nowhere near where I needed to be, to be able to save my arse.

'I am sorry that you're not enjoying your stay, as much as I am,' Dimitri spoke quietly.

He sat directly opposite me with a smile that did not belong to this Dimitri, in a setting which definitely didn't belong.

I had nothing.

We were surrounded by trees and somewhere in the distance the sun broke through and the echo of the river resonated through the stillness.

The house behind us resembled St Vladimir's in the architectural sense, but in every other way it looked like it came straight out of some Russian fairy tale.

He looked around probably sensing my confusion about actually being allowed outdoors, then he looked back at me, 'I won't let you walk away from here.' He said with a smile.

I swallowed hard.

'They're looking for you, but they'll never get to you here.' He explained.

'So you'd watch me die?' I asked, hoping that I was getting some footing in this argument, 'I thought you loved me?'

He smirked and got up from his seat, 'I do love you, _that's_ _why_ I'm not letting you go.'

My heart sunk, he was right. We were surrounded by more than a hundred Strigoi, including him, the God. What hope in hell did _they,_ a group of barely better than Novices and a few guardians have of getting me out alive.

'Don't make me hurt you, Roza, come to me willingly.' He pleaded, or whatever this resembled.

'You're already hurting me, comrade,' my lip unwillingly twitched into a smile, a remembered gesture.

I'm not sure if it was my imagination, or whether that statement actually did something to him, but for a split second I thought I saw the redness in his eyes soften.

Just as quickly as I saw it he had turned away and all the evil was back.

'It's getting dark, time to go inside.' He muttered angrily getting to his feet and pulling my arm, roughly dragging me behind him.

We walked in silence together until we reached my room.

'Why haven't you done it yet?' I asked before he had a chance to walk away silently.

He narrowed his eyes at me. 'Done what?'

'Made me like you?' I asked stepping forward, 'you must have a reason?'

He took a step closer to me.

His eyes were as cold as ever, but his smile reminded me of the old Dimitri.

My breath hitched in my chest as he moved closer and closer to me until all the space between us was gone, his hand fell on my hip pulling me closer while he ran his other hand through my hair.

'Do you want to be like me?' He asked softly.

My heart raced as broken breaths escaped my lips.

'Because I can do that Roza,' he murmured tracing soft kisses along my jawline.

I closed my eyes instinctively leaning in to him.

He pulled my hair over my shoulder and continued leaving kisses on my neck.

'Stop.' I barely managed; obviously sounding conflicted in my own reasoning.

'Do you really want me to stop?' He whispered back brushing his teeth along the delicate skin on my neck.

The euphoria from the last bite still pulsed through my veins, begging him for that release again, and my stupid brain refused to keep up.

'Because I know you don't.' He added finally sinking his teeth into my neck.

I gasped so loudly I nearly made myself pass out.

His fierceness burned through me as the pain dissipated and turned into pure bliss, my weakened state became ever more so as my knees buckled and I felt myself fall into him, I felt myself giving into the darkness.

His strong arms held me against his body while he walked us over to my bed and laid me down.

My mind raced, 'no,' I whimpered as he pressed his body against mine still taking my blood into his mouth.

'Don't,' I murmured, 'please.'

Finally he pulled back and I immediately regretted it.

His lips left a burning desire for more, while my body shivered from being up against him for so long; it craved warmth while I craved his touch.

'I wouldn't do that to you, Roza, you mean more to me than that.' He added before planting a soft kiss on my cheek.

And once more my body yearned for him as he left me.

Adrian was right, he was keeping me weak for a reason, but he wasn't turning me. Maybe I was getting through to him; then again, maybe he was biding his time.

Either way, I was exhausted, and my days were getting shorter and shorter and my strength was depleting fast.

Hopefully Adrian had some good news for me.

I closed my eyes and waited for sleep to come and with it, hope.

* * *

**Thank you for joining me! See you soon!**


	2. Chapter 2

in this chapter we see a flashback to the past, this will be shown in it's own page break!

* * *

_I was sucked into my dreams as soon as Adrian could make the connection, same as last time it was dark, too dark and I could barely make out my surroundings. Just like he'd mentioned it was harder and harder for him to come through._

_'Little Dhampir.' But finally I heard the familiar voice call through the still night._

_I couldn't help the smile which came over me, 'Adrian.'_

_His usual quirky smile was absent, instead replaced by a grim, serious look, 'are you ok?'_

_I nodded, 'have you made any progress?'_

_'I think we found where he's keeping you,' he explained in an urgent tone._

_My eyes widened and my heart began to race, 'where am I?'_

_'Alaska, right outside of Anchorage,' he said firmly, the grim look on his face deepening._

_'How far out are you?' I asked desperately._

_Suddenly freedom was in my grasp and I didn't know how I felt about it…I was happy of course, I was going home, but never being able to see Dimitri again, despite his undead state, I was still a little sad about it._

_'We're on route now; I'm sleeping in the back of an SUV.' He explained._

_'Who's we?' I asked curiously._

_'Christian, Lissa, obviously me and a group of seven guardians including your mother.' He offered, his expression finally softening._

_I nodded hesitantly, I knew the Moroi had been practicing more and more with the use of their elements, but any time Lissa was involved, I felt nauseous, if anything happened to her because she was getting me out of trouble, I would never forgive myself. But I knew that she would never take sitting on the sidelines as an option._

_'You have to be careful, he's got an army here, there are more Strigoi in this location than we've ever had to face before,' I said keeping out the part that Dimitri was probably going to kill me before they had a chance to get to me._

_Finally a hint of a grin appeared on Adrian's face, 'don't worry about us, we've got it covered, do you think you'll be strong enough to keep any of them at bay until I come to you?'_

_'Probably, as long as he doesn't come to…feed,' I murmured._

_The correlation to being bitten and fed on was as close to being a "blood whore" as one could get and the thought of it still made me cringe._

_Adrian did a good job pretending not to be as angry as I was, and just nodded, 'keep him away, at all costs, do whatever you have to Rose.'_

_'Did you find the cure?' I asked hopefully, although all logic and reason told me I was being an idiotic little girl._

_'Yes,' he replied with a smile, 'that's why you need to be ready, you need to be the one to administer it.'_

_My heart automatically began racing, 'please tell me this isn't one of your tactics to keep me hanging on until you come.'_

_He shook his head, 'sadly for me, it isn't, you'll have your Dimitri back.'_

_I bit my lip as tears sprung to my eyes and that light fluttery feeling in my chest which was reserved only for Dimitri swept through me without restraint._

_'Thank you,' I whispered wrapping my arms around him._

_'Just stay alive,' he said softly nudging me in the ribs, 'I'll see you soon.'_

_I managed a nod before the dream ended and I woke with a violent start._

* * *

Sweat beaded on my forehead drenching my hair which had fallen on my face sometime throughout the night.

A groan escaped my lips as the pain from my aching body spread through me again, no wonder I was so sweaty, my whole body was feverish trying to recoup. I guess struggling and fighting against Strigoi on a daily basis took it out of you.

I ran my fingers through my hair contemplating what to do next, Adrian's news put me in a better mood than I'd been in for months, to be precise three months, three months since the day everything changed in my life.

St Vladimir's was attacked when Lissa and Christian had been there, thankfully they weren't hurt, but in all the chaos we had lost more than fifteen amazing guardians, amongst them Dimitri. He was turned into one of them right in front of me.

He tells me now that I was incredibly lucky that I wasn't there to witness the turn, apparently it's painful and gruesome, the part where the soul leaves and the body comes back from the dead.

After that they moved everyone to a "safer" location, more guardians, more wards and more Moroi using their elemental magic to protect themselves. But when the next attack came, we were hopelessly underprepared and underarmed, Dimitri led them and when I first saw him my heart fell through the floor.

His usually warm and calm demeanour was replaced with a harsh and determined one. His eyes looked straight through me, picking me out from amongst the chaos.

Lissa and Christian fought alongside whatever was left of the guardians but his attack on the premises wasn't to hurt anyone else, it was to get to me, as much as I think about how horrible this situation is, it's still better than the thought if Lissa being hurt or dead.

I learned through Adrian's dreams that another six guardians died that day.

The latch on the door shook me out of my thoughts and as always for the past three months he came.

If it wasn't for the red rings around his eyes I could have sworn he was the old Dimitri again.

'What do you want?' I hissed getting to my feet as newly pent up fury raged through me.

I was so close to finishing this, to being free and getting him back, that every extra second I had to spend with him now made my blood run cold.

He walked closer and closer until he was inches away.

I felt an increasing urge to punch him in the face although I knew that would only entertain him more.

'You still think someone's going to find you?' He asked incredulously.

My face remained neutral, _yes, yes someone is going to find me,_ I wanted to shout. But he couldn't know that.

'I'm not going to give in to you,' I said firmly, trying to feel as confident as I sounded.

'We'll see,' he smiled, 'how much longer can you hold out Roza?'

I cringed, hearing my name like _that_ from him as a Strigoi made me want to scream, ergo proving his point. How much longer could I really hold out?

'Even if they do find you, they're not going to get to you in time,' he said softly stepping closer to me making my heart pound against my chest, 'what do they have, six, seven guardians left?'

'You should know,' I hissed back balling my fists, 'you killed them all.'

To this he only shook his head, 'I didn't kill any of them, the others did.' He said simply as though that made it all ok.

I let out a sarcastic laugh, 'that's almost worse.'

'For your conscience or mine?' He countered.

'You don't have one,' I muttered stepping back and away from him.

He narrowed his eyes at my move but stayed in his spot.

'What do you want?' I repeated.

Every other day that he had come in it was to _feed_ or simply to torment me, this time was different.

He made no further move toward me; instead he looked at me in some sort of transfixed state and smiled a little too eerily.

I remained still and watched him.

Strangely I felt the onset of fear mixed in with morbid curiosity.

'What do _you_ want Rose?' He asked suddenly.

His question took me by surprise, which these days was a feat in itself, I found myself pondering the best answer to give him rather than the one I wanted to blurt out like a scared little girl.

So I opted for the most honest one I could muster up, '_I_ want to kill you.'

* * *

The next two chapters will tie this up!


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